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Thought for the day..."If you want to be confident, but normally don't act that way,
today, just this once, act in the physical world the way you think a confident person
would." Dr. Wayne Dyer
Steve Wells' series on EFT and Self-Acceptance
Part 2 of 4
Here is Part 2 of Steve Wells' series. Click here to review Part 1. Please note how using
EFT on some of Steve's Self-Acceptance issues brings out a major (and healthy) shift in
perception. I chose to comment on it within Steve's message.
At the end, Steve gives some useful steps for using EFT for Self-Acceptance.
For 30 days I had committed myself to tapping on Accepting myself despite my
limitations. Id had some initial success, but on Day 5 I achieved a
I was sitting in front of my computer that evening reviewing the notes I had made. I
realised that despite some success, I was still feeling down on myself and didnt
seem to be getting far enough just applying EFT to the presenting issues and related
beliefs. I needed to address the issue of self-acceptance more directly.
I typed the following:
I FULLY AND COMPLETELY ACCEPT MYSELF.
As I considered what associations I had to the idea of accepting myself I realised that
the truth was I didnt accept myself at all. I decided this was the issue that needed
to be met head-on, not all those things Id been amassing as reasons not to accept
As I began tapping, I realised that underlying my non-self-acceptance was a fear that
accepting myself was bad and would lead me down the path of ego. I also believed that if I
accepted myself for all the things I had been doing that were wrong then I might not fix
them. I might just continue to procrastinate and do things that werent really good
for me. At a deeper level I also believed I was unacceptable to God.
So I tapped on these beliefs in both positive and negative form. I applied EFT to each
negative belief by putting it into the set-up statement and repeating the full statement
at every tapping point. As I tapped on each statement, I paid attention to the thoughts
and feelings that came up with it and applied EFT to any negative and related beliefs that
Even though if I accept myself completely I wont keep improving, I fully and
completely accept myself.
Even IF I fully and completely accept myself, I am still a good person.
Underneath, I believed I would not be a good person if I accepted myself. This was
connected to some deeply held spiritual beliefs from my early (negative) religious
programming, so I tapped on:
Even THOUGH I fully and completely accept myself, I am still acceptable to
This caused a very negative reaction. I thought: No I am NOT fully and completely
acceptable to God! God wants me to be better and to do better
So I tapped on: Even though God couldnt possibly accept me the way I am, I
fully and completely accept myself. And Even though I am completely
unacceptable to God, I fully and completely accept myself.
I then began to think: This (non-self-acceptance) is rubbish! Jesus forgave people
their sins. Do I think God will not accept me? Forgive me? Arent acceptance and
forgiveness just two sides of the same coin?
I continued to explore my underlying fears. It seemed to me that too much self-acceptance
could lead to me being ego-driven and making out that I was superior, like a god.
I applied EFT to this by putting it into the set-up statement and repeating it at every
tapping point just as I had done with the previous belief statements (Even though if
I accept myself completely I will be unacceptable to God
though if I accept myself Im making out that Im superior
I then thought: Rubbish! Im not making myself God by accepting myself.
Im merely revelling in what HE has created. Should not I love myself AND my
neighbour AS myself? How can I love my neighbour as myself if I dont love
Finally, after several more rounds of tapping, I had an intense realisation:
Accepting myself is NOT the same as ego taking over. God loves and accepts me
unconditionally, I just havent accepted myself. Accepting myself IS good.
And then a whole host of positive thoughts and feelings came rushing in. It was as if all
the things I wanted to believe and knew were really true finally felt true. I felt I
re-connected with my true purpose and all the barriers just melted away.
NOTE FROM GC: Please notice how Steve's tapping on these issues brought about new
perspectives--new reframes--new belief changes. These shifts in perception happen
frequently with EFT. It's as though the mental barriers to the truth has been lifted.
STEVE CONTINUES: As these positive thoughts flooded my being, they were accompanied by a
feeling of peace that is difficult to describe, a feeling that lasted several days and
bathed me in its light.
For the first time I realised the true power of self-acceptance, and saw the stupidity of
our prevailing belief that we need to put ourselves down in order to get ourselves to do
things in order to make ourselves happy. I realised I could be happy no matter what I did,
and no matter what was happening around me and that this would not only not impede
me from moving forward, it would help me to do so. I also realised being happy with myself
meant I could do so much more for others
From this point onwards I was able to effortlessly proceed with my work, attacking with
relish projects on which Id been bogged down for months. I didnt even feel
like doing the things I had previously been doing that were distractions. I no longer
found myself playing games on computer. I was able to reinstate my exercise program and
improve on it. I started to enjoy my work again and felt I was back to working
To put it simply, my life changed, and so correspondingly did
the lives of others with whom I began to share these insights.
Now whenever problems come up, besides addressing the problem itself, I also address the
issue of self-acceptance. I encourage you to do the same. Ive found that whenever I
confront a problem Im now able to see the problem as separate from myself, and even
when something I am doing is a problem I dont usually get down on myself about it, I
just focus on the best way forward.
I believe the issue of self-acceptance, an issue that has been staring us in the face
every time we do the Set-up statement in EFT, offers a doorway to a new level of being in
the world, and a new level of self-growth and happiness.
If youd like to see how far self-acceptance tapping can take you, here are the first
two steps I recommend you take:
1. Identify any problem to work on using EFT. Apply EFT to the idea of accepting yourself
despite having this problem (and even if you continue to have this problem). Repeat the
self-acceptance statement at each tapping point in the same form as you used it in the
Set-up: i.e. Even though I have this problem I fully and completely accept
myself stated as you tap on each point. Meditate on the idea of accepting yourself
as unacceptable as this may feel while you tap on each point.
2. Catch yourself in non-acceptance then do EFT on the very thing(s) that you are
not accepting yourself for
Now focus on two different ideas one that you
accept yourself despite the fact that you are doing, thinking, etc this thing, and second,
that even though you do not accept yourself for doing, thinking, etc this thing that you
are going to accept yourself anyway even though what you are doing, thinking etc is
this treats you for the second wounding that of picking on
yourself for picking on yourself
When you have treated the upset at yourself for
your problem then you are free to address the original problem
And sometimes, this
feeling about the problem is the main problem. Once this is treated, often no trace of the
original problem remains.
EFT Contributing Editor
Note 1: Upcoming EFT Workshops in USA and Europe by Steve Wells and Dr David Lake. Learn
how to use EFT to help yourself/your clients to achieve goals of self-acceptance, positive
relationships, personal growth, and building new futures. Limited places available.
Note 2: Our new book Pocket Guide to Emotional Freedom provides all the
information you need to know to get started in using EFT to improve your life.